| Accepting Help Graciously, Copyright Sandy Long - Friday, November 09, 2007 Being lady drivers, we seem to have to work harder at proving ourselves than the guys do. |
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Being lady drivers, we seem to have to work harder at proving ourselves than the guys do. We quickly develop an “I don’t need any help” attitude after being laughed at or looked down on for asking for help or assistance. It is the way it is in the industry sometimes. Not everyone is adverse to helping or assisting us though, but after awhile it becomes hard to accept help even when we really need it. Recently, I was in a warehouse lot getting loaded. A lady driver was struggling to get her pin pulled to move her tandems. It was icy and she fell. Before I could get out of my truck to offer assistance, a male driver ran over to help her. She batted away his hand, he drew back and walked away shaking his head. I went over to see if she would allow me to assist her…she said, “I don’t need any….help.” Climbing back into my truck I watched her struggle for almost half an hour and falling twice more before she finally got the tandems to slide. I have heard this same type of story many times from male drivers…”I saw this driver having problems. I offered to help the driver, but she wouldn’t let me.” The male driver always sounds a little bewildered. I am probably one of the hardest headed people you will want to meet in that if you are going to do a job, then do it yourself, but even I accept help when I am having problems and cannot get something to work. I do have one rule though. I never ask for any help that a male wouldn’t ask for, it is why I gave up flatbedding. So, what are some of the things you might accept help for? Here are a few…they will differ for different people. Getting the tandems to slide or pulling the pin Sliding your fifth wheel Backing into a tight spot Watching your blind side If you have locked your keys in the truck Asking advice if you don’t know how to do something Help getting out of a tight dock/parking place Help getting out if you are stuck If your brakes freeze Here are some things you really should be able do for yourself! (I have seen female drivers ask for help doing these things!) Pulling your hood open or closing it Hooking up or dropping your trailer Checking your oil/water Washing the windshields Knowing how to load a load Change a light Closing your trailer doors Fueling your truck Doing your pretrip Tarping/securing your load There are a lot of nice people on the road that don’t mean anything bad by offering help without being asked. Chivalry is not really dead on the road, there are a lot of White Knights left that just want to help another driver regardless of gender. Many of us old hands are passing on assistance that we have gotten in the past, it is a much less used concept than it once was, but that is another article. You can judge whether the person offering assistance is doing it out of goodness of heart or being patronizing. Even if you are having a really bad day, there is no reason to be rude to someone offering assistance. Practice saying ‘thank you, yes, I would like some help’ or ‘thank you, but no, I don’t need any help right now’ and then you will at least be gracious to the person trying to be nice by offering help and will be a good example to the patronizing ones. All drivers need help occasionally even us lady drivers. |
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